'Why can't you just stop being so spoilt?': Two moms battle over first class seat aboard long flight

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Mar 4, 2023 11:00 AM EST

When flying for an extended period of time, it only makes sense to sit in comfort if you can. That didn't stop this woman's stepsister in law from flipping out that she couldn't fly in style too! 

This woman asked r/AmItheA**hole if she was in the wrong when a fight cropped up between her and her step sis. Both have children – the OP has a 5 year old, while her SIL has a 7 year old. They decided to travel together for a visit to South Africa, though they booked their flights separately. The OP noted that she always flies first class when doing long haul flights, since she has the financial means to. And who can blame her? If you have the money and enjoy these creature comforts in life, who's to stop you?

The OP's SIL wanted to stop her, though. The SIL, Lisa, was furious that she wasn't sitting in first class, telling the OP that it would add stress onto her flight. Scroll down below to check out the dramatic family fight. Then, this person just wanted to park, then dash into the donut shop before it closed… but this parking spot thief had other plans. 

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  • 01
    Font - 'AITA for telling my SIL to stop being broke?'
    via Reet Talreja
  • 02
    Font - r/AmItheA hole Posted by u/Throwaway-firstclass 1 day ago D AITA for telling my SIL to stop being broke when she complained about me flying first class? Not the A-hole Me (32F), my daughter (5), my stepbrother Teddy's (34) wife Lisa (32F), and their son Sam (7) were travelling to South Africa to visit family. I was also travelling with someone who works for us, Jake. Teddy was already in South Africa, with Lisa and I going later because of school term dates.
    via u/Throwaway-firstclass
  • 03
    Font - We booked the flights separately. I spoke to Teddy about which flight would work, but that's all the coordination we had.
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  • 04
    Font - For long haul flights I always fly first class. My daughter is a better flyer that way, as there's less people, she has more space, and it abates my travel anxiety. My family know I fly first class for long hauls so I didn't feel the need to bring this up prior to the flight. We carpooled to the airport, but first class has a separate check-in. Lisa was surprised I was flying first class and said surely my daughter is old enough to behave herself in economy. I said it wasn't about behavin
    via u/Throwaway-firstclass
  • 05
    Font - Again, I tried to start going to my check in, but Lisa started saying how now she had to deal with Sam alone for the whole flight which she wasn't prepared for, and that she's stressed enough without having no help the whole time. She was getting close to tears by this point and I was at total loss what to do. I apologised for the confusion but she wasn't satisfied, saying this is no way to treat family. Eventually, she just snapped "why can't you just stop being so spoilt?' in a shrill t
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  • 06
    Font - When we met up with Teddy, Lisa was in a horrible mood and wouldn't speak to me. Later, Teddy and I were talking and he said I shouldn't have said what I did, to which I said his wife shouldn't have melted down in the airport over my travel arrangements. I wasn't going to be babysitting Sam even if I had sat in economy, it would have made no difference to her, and she's well aware of how I travel. She's still not speaking to me over a week later. My stepdad said I was in the right and she
    via u/Throwaway-firstclass
  • 07
    Font - IamIrene 1 day ago Colo-rectal Surgeon [40] Lisa started saying how now she had to deal with Sam alone for the whole flight which she wasn't prepared for, and that she's stressed enough without having no help the whole time So she assumed you would help her with her child for the duration of the flight? Without discussing it with you first, knowing you have your child with you too? Wow. Nervy and presumptive. I'd say your reaction was justified, you were swatting down her green-eyed monst
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  • 08
    Font - Throwaway-firstclass OP 1 day ago Wouldn't be the first time. She tries to pawn Sam off on relatives quite a bit on holidays. When I had a nanny she was always trying to get her to watch Sam.
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  • 09
    Font - Curious_Puffin 1 day ago Partas ipant [2] You mention travelling with staff. Is Jake there as a childminder? If so Lisa was probably hoping to foist Sam on him for the flight, and beyond. NTA. You are not responsible for her assumptions about how you are going to live your life and spend your money, and you gave as good as you got in the disagreement, which is fair. 70 Reply Share Throwaway-firstclass OP 1 day ago Jake isn't a childminder. At home he's a driver/odd job person. My husband
    via u/Throwaway-firstclass
  • 10
    Font - AvailableAd1925. 1 day ago And she did it after insinuating OP and the daughter is going to 1st class because the daughter can't behave. Entitled and delusional.
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  • 11
    Font - SnooPets8873 - 1 day ago. edited 22 hr. ago Parta pant [3] I mean if I had a child and was traveling with a relative who also had a child, I would feel comfortable assuming that we'd do things like - "hey can you keep an eye out while I go to the bathroom?" Or "oh no, she is crying, do you want me to grab a toy from the overhead?" I don't think that's per se presumptuous. Her bad/worst behavior for me kicks in where she starts judging OP and being rude instead of just adjusting her mistak
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  • 12
    Font - realstareyes 1 day ago Supreme Court Just-as [138] NTA. Lisa is the one who verbally attacked you for literally no reason. You simply set a boundary after she threw a completely unnecessary tantrum out of jealousy and chose to stir s, so what did she expect? She should mind her own business and leave you alone with it.
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  • 13
    Font - Illustrious_Leg_2537 1 day ago I missed the part where you asked Lisa to pay for some portion of your trip, because otherwise, it's none of her business what class ticket you bought. When did people become so enraged with the choices other people make? Oh yeah, she was hoping Jake or you would help her with her own child. ΝΤΑ
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  • 14
    Font - Zoobie Doobie_Doo 1 day ago NTA. You are separate families, separate households, separate incomes, separate daily lives. You didn't purchase seats together. She never had any reason to assume you would even be seated near her, even if you were in economy. This is her expectations disappointing her and putting responsibilities on you that she shouldn't have. She can be upset all she wants for having to sit alone in economy with her own child, but that doesn't make it your problem in first
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  • 15
    Font - Garamon7 Parta sipant [1] 1 day ago My family know I fly first class for long hauls so I didn't feel the need to bring this up prior to the flight. If Lisa knew that you usually travel first class NTA. There is no reason for you to change your habits. We booked the flights separately. I spoke to Teddy about which flight would work, but that's all the coordination we had. Why she'd thought you could help her with Sam? If you/v booked separately he likehood of you sitting next to each other
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  • 16
    Font - . ghiblidemon 1 day ago NTA. She had no authority to speak to you like that and it was clear jealousy. What did she expect was gonna happen when she called you spoiled for buying a better seat with your own money??
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  • 17
    Font - Sole Murias 1 day ago Parta ipant [1] NTA. Could you have been nicer? Maybe, but Lisa was being very entitled. What did she expect? For you to give up your seats? Maybe send Jake in economy with both kids? She needs to get over her issues, buy better seats if she can afford them or resign herself to economy.
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  • 18
    Font - harleybidness. 1 day ago rintendant [57] P NTA. It would have been better if you had maintained your demeanor, thank her for sharing, and walked away. Many would think that combat (what you did) was appropriate because there are consequences for our behavior. I think that repeating offensive behavior in public brings oneself down to the level of the offender. The high road always yields a better outcome for yourself. The differentiating factor was that you were in public. Combat is always
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  • 19
    Font - Bladedbabe Parta ipant [1] 1 day ago NTA. There was no arrangement to sit together or for you to help babysit. She was acting entitled.
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  • 20
    Font - slendermanismydad 22 hr. ago. edited 21 hr. ago Partas ipant [3] . Again, I tried to start going to my check in, but Lisa started saying how now she had to deal with Sam alone for the whole flight which she wasn't prepared for, and that she's stressed enough without having no help the whole time. Sam is her kid and you have your own kid. I see she frequently tries to pawn Sam off on relatives.
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  • 21
    Font - If she wanted to sit with you, why didn't she coordinate with you on making the plans? To me, this reads more like she assumed you would be in economy which I wouldn't assume and that you would nearby each other which again, I definitely would not assume. She also assumed you would have time for Sam. Again, no. You also said you wouldn't because she does this all the time. Eventually, she just snapped "why can't you just stop being so spoilt?' But demanding you sit with her isn't spoiled
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  • 22
    Font - bekahed979 19 hr. ago Eventually, she just snapped "why can't you just stop being so spoilt?' I think what she was really saying was "why can't you just give me what I want?"
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  • 23
    Font - AnnaBanana1129 21 hr. ago Wait... Your child is old enough to do fine in economy but her LITERAL older kid isn't and requires assistance? GTFO You are 100% NTA and for what it's worth; I agree with you 100%. The first time I did first class was a work trip to Hawaii. I would have put someone in a body bag on that 14 hour flight if I wasn't in my little pod. If a flight takes longer than an hour, I go first class. I'm not prissy, entitled, but I work hard, fly rarely, so I can reward mysel
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flight South Africa flying stepsister broke family money children
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